Flower Remedies…one year later
When I returned home from attending the funeral for our nephew I was 9 weeks away from my due date with Rainier. I felt totally disconnected from him. He had, thankfully, been overwhelmingly active for the whole week, but I didn’t really *feel* pregnant. I wasn’t interested in monitoring his activity. I was’t able to talk to him. And I had this overwhelming feeling that birth was an ending instead of a beginning. I knew that we needed to reconnect to prepare for labor and birth.
Our family had success taking walnut flower essence when we returned from Rwanda. I initially thought that it would be a bunch of hocus-pocus, but quickly realized that I was able to write, blog and talk about the transition when I was taking walnut essence. When I wasn’t taking it everything got stuck and I felt completely lost. I don’t know how bottled energy from a flower could have that kind of effect (I don’t even know HOW they bottle energy from a flower in the first place), but I’m not one to argue with results.
After some research, I began taking three remedies to help Rainier and I: Star of Bethlehem, Mariposa Lily and Evening Primrose. The Star of Bethlehem was to help general trauma processing. Mariposa Lily and Evening Primrose were recommended to help us connect and help him to recover from the week of disconnection while I focused on James. I added 4 drops of each remedy to every glass of water that I drank.
Within a few days I felt pregnant again. I started talking to “baby” and feeling like he responded to me. As we processed our grief together I felt his activity levels subside to more typical patterns (it has seemed to hold true that Rainier handles fear/shock/pain by MOVING a lot so his activity that week correlates with the emotions that I passed on to him). Over the next few weeks I worked through my fear of birth being the end of our relationship and continued to take the remedies.
Rainier’s birth was basically perfect. He, Robin and I were all an amazing team and I still get high when I think about the moment that I pulled him into my arms just as the midwives walked in the door. I don’t have any sort of scientific evidence that flower essence make any difference in my mind or my energy, but I have a lot of unscientific respect for the effects I’ve seen from taking them. I don’t think I would have had the birth experience that I did without their help.