During the First Week
I have a chalkboard! Isn’t it beautiful? Most of the teachers have whiteboards, but I put in a special request to have a nerdy chalkboard. Teaching physics just wouldn’t feel right without the little pieces of colored chalk. The only downside is that I have to erase it with a wet rag, but that’s where my bathroom comes in handy. Yes, I have a bathroom in my classroom. The school buildings were originally built to be houses and my classroom was a master suite. It’s great motivation for students to use the bathroom between classes.
Things I’ve learned during this first week of school:
-Seventh graders are aware of some of the most random current events. “Men in Turkey, ya, were getting upset at the swimming pool because other men were looking at their woman!”
-Sometimes, when your names are Mr. and Mrs. Crocker, students will assume that you are brother and sister.
-Sixth graders can’t be counted on to pull the curtains back inside the window before closing the slats in a rainstorm.
-Nobody can find their way around two identical duplex houses without knocking on at least one wrong class door.
-When students say, “Teachers just expect so much out of me!” the proper response is not “yeah, that’s tough isn’t it?”
-Books are optional.
-Fifth and sixth grade boys will comment on how your shirt and slacks match.
-Occasionally, high school students will mistake the sound of a nearby elementary teacher’s voice for a recording and ask you to “turn it off.”
-It is possible for a new desk to become completely disorganized in just three days.
-Don’t use dressing yourself as an example of independence when you know that one student’s mother still sets out his clothes every morning to make sure that they color coordinate.
-Kindergarten girls should always wear floppy hats and sunglasses for recess.
-Sarcasm is wasted this early in the year.